Some women are just naturally unlucky in love. They may find a wonderful man, fall deeply in love with him and then, and only then, discover that he is afraid of marriage. By then the woman is so entrenched in the relationship that she believes she has no choice but to sit it out and patiently wait for his fear to magically disappear. That's not likely to happen. Overcoming fear of commitment issues takes time and patience. If you believe that you two are destined to be husband and wife, then you need some insight into how to subtly push him from a fear of a serious relationship into craving a commitment with you.
Overcoming fear of commitment starts with identifying what the cause of that apprehension is. Many men confuse a fear of getting married with unwillingness. They imagine that once they take the walk down the aisle, their sense of self and freedom will evaporate. If your boyfriend has alluded to these kinds of thoughts by saying things like he needs time with his friends or talking about how his married friends have given up their lives, you need to take steps to show him that's not how married life with you will be. Keep your life full and dynamic. Spend time away from your man and talk about how important your own life is to you. If he sees that you're not ready to give up anything for him either, he'll let his guard down. He needs to know that your relationship is not going to suddenly change his entire life just because you two make a vow of commitment.
Another reason that many men shy away from marriage is their finances. Weddings can be incredibly expensive. Add to that the cost of a mortgage, saving for retirement and all the expenses associated with having kids and your guy may be feeling the pinch in his wallet. If you believe his fear of commitment is tied to the fact that he's not feeling stable financially, explain to him that you're not about to give up your job just because you become his wife. Talk about how you two can have a budget wedding and how a honeymoon can wait. If he feels less pressure to pay for things, he may relax about the idea of getting engaged. Remind him that you two are in it together for the long haul and you'll always pull your own financial weight.
You don't have to wait for him to decide whether or not he's ready to commit to you. If you are tired of putting your dreams on hold because he's commitment phobic, there are things you can do to make him want to marry you now. Learn right now what you need to do to make him fall to his knees and beg you to marry him.
No comments:
Post a Comment